heyya. Apa kabar semuanya? Insyaallah, Allah jaga kalian semua ya. Hari ini gue bangun pagi-pagi dengan sangat senang mau membagikan info seputar barang bawaan buat umrah. 

Persiapaan yang gue lakukan awal banget sebenernya adalah masukin barang-barang ke koper (ya iya sih Cit, wkwk). Gue membawa dua koper, satu medium size, dan satunya cabin size. Dengan jatah bagasi 2x23 kg, gue sudah berniat untuk cabin case gue dimasukin ke bagasi nantinya. Sebelum berangkat, gue membeli satu buku umrah yang menurut gue ini berguna banget buat diikutin, belinya disini. Disitu lengkap banget ditulis tentang tata cara umrah, hal-hal ynag dilakukan sebelum ihram, dan termasuk barang bawaan yang perlu dipersiapkan. Okay, let's start! 

1. Persiapan Baju

Gue sadar, gue nggak punya banyak baju yang proper: yang menutup sampe punggung tangan dan kalo bisa nggak ngatung(?) di kaki. Jadi gue memutuskan untuk membeli kaus tangan, kaus kaki wudhu serta legging wudhu. Sebenarnya, gue mau banget pakai baju ihram warna putih, tapi setelah gue baca-baca, buat perempuan nggak ada kewajiban syarat baju ihram harus bagaimana, yang penting syar'i. Baju ihram adalah hal pertama yang gue pack, satu paket dengan kaus kaki dan Unterwasche lainnya. Baju ihram gue terdiri dari dua Teile: Luaran panjang dan baju dress yang sebenernya ngatung. So, gue memutuskan buat pake stocking.

Sisanya, gue mulai pilah-pilih baju-baju yang mau gue mau bawa. Jujur kalo boleh saran, bawa secukupnya. Umrah itu sekitar 10-12 hari, gue dulu bawa baju sekitar 8 dan sisanya ya mix and match aja. Sepengalaman gue, baju ini tetep kurang apalagi dengan cuaca panas dan gampang keringetan. Jadi, disana gue memutuskan untuk cari laundry aja, harganya 35 Riyal per kilo. Kenapa gue bilang bawa secukupnya? Karena sayang aja kalo disana ujung-ujungnya laundry dan pastiiii banget bakalan beli baju baru, gue pun membeli baju ihram baru supaya lebih nyaman, karena baju disana itu lebih syar'i dan lebih murah kalo dibandingin beli di Jerman. Baju panjang, abaya gitu harganya mulai dari 30 Riyal, (sekitar 6€) untuk versi paling ekonomisnya. 

Cari baju yang selain syar'i, tentunya yang senyamaan mungkin. Kaus kaki wudhu buat gue sangat membantu apalagi buat yang susah jaga wudhu nya. Buat hijab, cari hijab yang sepanjang-panjangnya dan kalo bisa yang nggak ribet pakainya. Kayak khimar atau hijab langsung gitu akan sangat-sangat membantu, karena jarang banget tempat wudhu yang ada cerminnya, pake hijab begini bikin kita nggak merasa kerepotan kalo harus rapih-rapih sehabis wudhu.

2. Persiapan Toiletteries

Standar banget kalo traveling pasti kita akan pindahin alat-alat mandi dan skin care kita ke jar atau container yang versi imut. Dan buat yang belum tau, saat sedang ber-ihram, kita dilarang melakukan beberapa hal, salah satunya memakai produk yang ada fragrance nya. Alhasil pencarian berikutnya adalah membeli barang-barang yang totally fragrance free: dari deodorant, lotion badan, balm buat bibir, sabun cuci muka, pasta gigi, sabun mandi. Gue nggak memutuskan membeli shampoo karena mau keramas sebelum ber-ihram saja. Semua barang ini available di DM. Ini beberapa hal yang mau gue highlight:

• Kalo bisa share sama temen, ini bakalan menguntungkan banget! yang kita pakai hanya sedikit kan? 
• Untuk deodorant, gue pakai Sebamed. Ini lumayan oke, tapi buat gue yang sangat sweaty, butuh re apply at least 2-3 kali sehari.
• Gue memutuskan membeli coconut oil karena sangat serbaguna, bisa buat rambut, buat bibir terutama, dan bisa buat badan juga. Gue nggak terlalu suka kalo buat badan sebenarnya, karena terlalu greasy, alternatif lain bisa pakai minyak zaitun. 
• Buat lotion badan gue membeli Penaten, lotion untuk bayi. Dia juga ada sabun nya yang bisa dipakai untuk cuci muka dan mandi. So far, enak banget dan nggak membuat kulit kering.
• Pasta gigi gue dari Waleda. Jujur, gue nggak tahu apa dia 100% parfümfrei, cuma kalo dari taste nya sih iya banget, nggak ada minty taste gitu, pure asin kayak garam. 

(standar bawaan setiap hari selama disana, minus sajadah 

dan botol minum yang qadarullah hilang, wkwk)

Assalamualaikum, 

heyya, despite of the title, I decided to write this post in Bahasa. Kayak, biar berasa aja gitu senengnya, bersyukurnya, biar lebih nyampe aja ke yang baca (lol, si ada).

Alhamdulillah, akhirnya kesampean banget bisa nulis tentang ini. Inget banget, ditanya sama Alif, "Cit tahun baruan kemana?" trus gue jawab,"ada deh, the place I've been longing to visit". Yeah, dan di dua kota ini gue menghabiskan akhir tahun gue: Makkah Al-Mukarramah and Madinah Al-Munawarrah.

Niat Untuk Ber Umrah

Perjalanan ke tanah suci ini bisa dibilang dadakan, eh nggak juga sih sebenernya. Jadi, niat mau ber umrah sudah ada dari 2018. Dulu rasanya kayak, ya pengen aja. Setelah cari-cari info, bertemu lah satu rombongan Indonesia dari Berlin (dari mana-mana juga sih) yang sebenernya beberapa pun gue sudah kenal. Qadarullah saat itu visa gue nggak mencukupi syarat, dan gue memutuskan batal ikut (dan niatnya dulu belum sebesar itu).

Setahun setelahnya, 2019, gue bisa dibilang financially capable untuk berangkat, tapi tahun tersebut gue lagi kemana-mana banget, tapi satu hal yang gue sadar, semuanya duniawi. Gitu ya, saat lo terlihat "mampu" tapi jadinya terlena, dan pikiran mau kesana tuh hilang menguap begitu saja. Bahkan kayaknya tahun tersebut adalah tahun dimana gue keluar negeri terbanyak selama hidup, kebetulan nyokap, bokap dan kakak gue dateng, alhamdulillah. Allah kasih rejeki untuk menyambut mereka disini, waktu itu moment nya adalah gue graduation. Disusul dengan proyek kampus di Kairo, dan akhir tahun gue pulang ke Indonesia. So, tahun tersebut penuh dengan banyaknya acara duniawi ya, semoga tetep ada berkah diwaktu-waktu yang sudah terlewat itu. 

Tahun 2020, inget banget gue sudah mendaftar umrah edisi budget buat student-student di Aachen. Gue dan dua orang lainnya, Widi dan Nada, sudah berniat mau umrah yang berangkat Februari 2021. Kami udah DP, dan qadarullah pandemi datang. Jadi rencana umrah ini akhirnya dibatalkan. Gue lumayan ikhlas, tapi lumayan down dikit, kayak, mau banget diundang gitu. Baru disini niat berumrah gue tingkatin banget.

Karena masih pandemi, gue berpikir kayaknya umrah nggak akan diadakan sampai agak reda angka infeksi nya. Bahkan di awal-awal pandemi, Makkah ditutup dan nggak ada jamaah sama sekali. Dan gue pun nggak mau memaksakan. Waktu itu sekitar bulan Oktober 2021, gue lihat pamflet umrah dari grup WhatsApp yang di forward mbak Rina (semoga Allah jaga beliau), dan mulai berpikir buat coba daftar. Gue menghubungi contact personnya bulan November. 

Ada banyak keraguan saat itu, masalah pandemi, hukum berangkat tanpa mahram bagaimana, yang banyak bikin gue mikir "Gue ibadah kok kayaknya maksa banget ya?" kondisi nya nggak memungkinkan dan gue pernah mendengar cerita bahwa ada laki-laki yang berangkat umrah dengan rombongan dan dia nggak diberitahu bahwa namanya dipake sebagai nama mahram orang lain, dan dia ga ridha, akhirnya gue berpikir untuk berangkat nanti aja saat sudah bisa berangkat bareng nyokap atau adek laki-laki gue atau ntar aja sama pasangan, pokoknya sama sebener-benernya mahram deh. Keresahan ini gue ceritakan ke nyokap, dia bilang kalo ada uang nya yaudah berangkat aja, yang sebenernya pun ga ada-ada amat tapi alhamdulillah ya cukup, dan yang gue yakinin bahwa Allah yang memilih dan menyanggupi siapa yang Dia undang.

Lalu gue telfonan dengan contact person nya, dan ternyata ini adalah perkumpulan muslim di salah satu Masjid di Frankfurt. Ustadz nya mengajar tiga kelas: Fiqh Ibadah; Aqidah; dan Sirah. Yang ikut umrah ini adalah murid-muridnya di kelas tersebut. Ustadz nya orang Indonesia, tapi lahir di Jerman dan ga bisa bahasa Indonesia. Kalo mau ditambah-tambahin, keraguan gue berikutnya adalah gue gak kenal orang-orangnya, terus mungkin ada kendala bahasa. Cuma gue yakin saat itu, ini dua alasan yang gue buat-buat aja. Dan ditambah-tambah bisikan syaitan pastinya, 'audzubillah.

Contact person nya ini lalu menyarankan gue untuk gabung di grup telegram. Dan gue baca-baca semua conversation nya dan ada ragu lagi disitu. Sempat gue leave group karena merasa "kayaknya ga sekarang deh" dan sempet di tanya jadi ikut atau nggak. Karena saat itu semuanya sebenernya belom pasti, apakah dapet visa, apakah berangkat karena kebetulan Omicron lagi bermunculan. 

Dan suatu hari gue berpikir, iya kalo Allah masih kasih gue umur. Mau nungguin orang lain atau waktu udah punya pasangan, siapa yang tau besok gimana? Kalo ada kesempatan tapi banyak ragunya gini kayaknya bukan sikap ke hati-hatian lagi, tapi udah bener godaan syaitan kali ya. Setelah cerita sama teman-teman juga, nanya Ustadzah, terus nonton YouTube tentang umrah, dan minta ke ridha-an Widi juga waktu itu (karena kami niat umrah bareng), gue akhirnya berpikir "ya udah kalo visa nya jadi berati Allah undang". Dan dengan bismillah, gue bulatkan tekad buat daftar sambil terus minta Allah lancarkan prosesnya dan Allah undang kami semua kesana. 

Proses Pendaftaran

Umrah pandemi begini memang syaratnya nambah, tapi bener-bener nggak ribet. Begini prosedur pendaftaran yang gue lakukan. 

1. Daftar di Website Agen

Kebetulan gue berangkat dengan Balcok, sebuah travel agen umrah dan haji yang sudah sering gue denger. Tapi nggak langsung daftar di websitenya , melainkan lewat link khusus yang dikasih Ustadz, karena kebetulan kami dapet paket yang berbeda dengan yang ada di website, dan ini juga memudahkan untuk penentuan rombongan. 

2. Pembayaran

Pembayaran dilakukan sebanyak dua kali, pertama adalah down payment dan yang kedua adalah pelunasan. Sewaktu transfer, mereka akan otomatis kirim email untuk konfirmasi dan memberi tahu step selanjutnya, yaitu persiapan dokumen.

3. Vaksin Meningitis

Karena belom punya Hausarzt gue lumayan lama cari ini vaksin, karena banyak praxis yang ga buka buat vaksin lain karena terlalu überfördert dengan vaksin corona. Akhirnya, gue menemukan vaksin yang nggak perlu antri dan buat janji, yaitu di Zentrum für Reisemedizin, kebetulan ada di beberapa kota salah satunya Dresden. Ini beberapa catatan tentang vaksin meningitis:

• bertanya ke agen perjalanan apa saja nama-nama vaksin yang diterima. Mereka biasanya punya list nya yang tentu punya plus minusnya sendiri

• pilih vaksin yang hanya diperlukan satu dosis. sehingga ga perlu sampe dua kali dulu baru lengkap dosisnya. Gue pake Nimenrix, harganya sekitar 79€, dan bisa direimburse ke TK, gampang banget kalo pake TK App, tinggal upload Rechnung jadi deh. alhamdulillah. (Buat keuntungan pake TK App akan gue bikin postingan sendiri ya)

• Nimenrix berlaku sepuluh tahun, ada juga yang hanya lima. Jadi, bisa dipertimbangkan memilih vaksi yang mana dari segi harga, masa berlaku nya, dan dosisnya. Gue pribadi pasti memilih yang lama masa berlakunya, sehingga insyaallah sampai bisa mengcover haji sekalian nantinya, aamiin ya Rabb. 

(Impfpass, disitu nama Vaksin nya Meningokokken ACWY dengan Impfstoff Nimenrix)

 (my bedroom)

I miss my room. 

I miss the sunshine that came through the curtains, as I never kept it dark. I always choose lightweight transparent fabric so I can welcome the sun. I know I hate the light sometimes. But the quiet room that faced the backyard made me fall in love with this apartment. My mind was trying to recall the first moment I came to visit that apartment as I write this post.

1. Decision to move together

Let me tell this clearly, the discussion to move in together came from us months before (maybe 3 months before we got the apartment in Adalbertsteinweg), without any force and it was truly our conscious decision. For whatever reason we had that time, for me, I lived in Crailsheim due to compulsory internship, as I decided to go back to Aachen, I got no room. The second brother was also finished with his bachelor's degree and he couldn't extend his permit to stay in the dorm. We asked the third person, the first brother, to move in with us, and yeah there were some discussions before he said yes, but from my point of view, it didn't take ages to finalize our discussion.

Then, I asked my parents' permission and they gave me it. They trusted me. And I maybe have been a good kid ever since so it was not hard to tell them. Naively, I was thinking that maybe people also had the same thought as I did back then. and the answer is no.

Little did I know many of them gave opinions on what happened and questioned our decision. I never cared, until now. So yeah, if one of us tell that this was a mistake, I now have to agree. Because yeah, as I finally gathered the answer after many whys, I then knew "Allah gak ridha"

2. Finding the apartment

Getting a place to live, whether it is a flat, a studio apartment, or even a dormitory room is not easy in Aachen. Aachen is a small city that has many universities. Of course, during the start of the semester, you will be guaranteed to get no chance to find a room, so at that time we decided to move at the beginning of November.

This was not the first apartment that we visited. There were some more but still in the center of Aachen (by center means just a couple of stations from Bushof). One is located near Scheibenstraße, they both did not like it (I was in Indo back then), the other one was a newly renovated apartment in Julicher Straße, the landlord wanted us as tenants but not each room is accessible through one door, so there would be a privacy issue, especially for the two. The last apartment we saw was near Adalbertsteinweg, but far from the bus station, the one next to is Rothe Erde which is 8 minutes away. This apartment has 4 rooms, one kitchen, and two bathrooms, so there will be more convenient for me to have a separate bathroom from the boys (haha sorry, but they knew what I was thinking about). But we didn't take it because of the proximity to everything and the rent was a bit high. 

So yeah, the apartment in Adalbertsteinweg is very much what we needed. Its location is superb, Netto is just across the street, many halal stores and restaurants are nearby, the bus station is just in front of the door, and the Rothe Erde Station is just maybe 8 minutes away, (not considerable, but Allah knew that it helped me a lot during my commute to Cologne as I worked there). I saw the advertisement online on wg-gesucht.de, the second brother was in Indo so I happened to go there with the first brother. (My first impression will follow), I liked it. And I said to him that I would like to take it, but the issue was that there was no storage for the bike, as he owned the bike and the apartment is located on the 3rd floor which is very inconvenient for him. and I understand how the struggle would be. The second brother said that okay if I liked it, he went with me, so after bargaining and discussing, all of them agreed. 

The thing is, we didn't know whether the landlord would choose us or not, since there might be many visitors. But thankfully, she chose us, and yeah the journey began.

3. Features of our apartment

You can ask the other two, they might agree that this place is the best place during our life in Aachen. I could not recall how many square meters the apartment has, but it was decent. The apartment has three bedrooms, one living room, one kitchen fully equipped with exhaust; a built-in oven, dishwasher, washing machine, and I love the color and materials, and of course, one petite bathroom.

The Kitchen

Besides my bedroom, the kitchen was the main reason why I wanted to take the apartment. It is dominated by wood, a bit of beige-colored plywood paired with textured oak (If I'm not mistaken) matches perfectly with the dark brown parquette. The natural light shines through the window that also faces the backyard. We bought a white dining table with two banks, so it was not purposefully intended for not only four people but could adequate more. The big and fully equipped kitchen was my dream. I like to cook for people so for me having a decent dining table nearby was truly a dream come true. I liked inviting people to come by. But the dining table was heavily used for just the three of us having casual dinner. Many things happened in our kitchen, the place was full of jokes, laughter, tears, deep conversations, arguments, pizzas, half-roasted chickens, or just us having tee together, oh I missed it.

The Living Room

The second place to hang out was our living room. We bought a secondhand sofa, the fabric was grey, which my second brother hated because it was a bit itchy and the smell was a bit unpleasant. My first brother bought the matching grey curtains from eBay and cut them by himself because it was way too long for the window. I put my TV there, my first brother mounted a hanging rack for it and put his stereo system there. Voila, it was our go-to place for NetFlix and chill (literally). My second brother and I often spent time there to binge-watch, and the brothers sometimes played PlayStation (not owned by us), and the sofa is also a place to crash for whoever wanted to stay overnight with us. In our living room, the old tenant also left the Kallax shelves for us, so we put our stuff there, mainly our books. 

The Bathroom

The most unlikely feature of our apartment was the bathroom. Many of our friends criticized how small it was. It was just 2 x 1,5m, but to us, it was okay. I remembered the time we wanted to invite our friends to our welcoming party, the pipes that attached to the bathroom and went through the kitchen were clogged, and we needed to call the plumbers to solve the case, sadly it was a public holiday (after new year's eve), so we had to try our best to fix it by ourselves. Our first teamwork, huh?

So, that was it. It was a short stay but very memorable. I miss the smell, the comfort, the scenery that I could enjoy during twilight, the annoying sound from firefighters, the crowd we heard from the street (Adalbertsteinweg is one of the main streets in Aachen), the washbasin that was placed very close to our toilet, my bedroom door which not built perfectly so I still could hear the footsteps even though I closed it tightly, the night conversation about life that we had in the kitchen and living room, the NetFlix and Catan time, the crowded kitchen when we cooked together, the invasion of the maggot in our trash that summer, the dust we had to clean up. Everything, the good and not-so-good part. I thanked them for finally being so patient to live together. 

But life. It must go on. I hope, it brings back some good memories for the brothers and also for everyone who visited us back then. Adalbersteinweg 243 was once, a comfortable place for us to be just the way we were.  

P.S. There are many photos I took, but these are the safest, with no human appearance due to privacy

Dresden, 19.01.2022

17:56

Heyya,

it is crazy that right now I am writing the first post in 2022. Wow. Time. flies. so. fast. I do pray that Allah gives barakah in the time we spend every day. 

This post is still about me trying to process my emotion because that way, I can learn more. This time, I'm trying to recall one experience.

The death of my grandmother. 

"Death is inevitable," a friend said to me. And yes, among all uncertainty in life, death is the most certain thing. And losing people you love and not going to see them forever again is still a strange feeling to me. I cried, yes I did. But the fear constantly comes, when will I be there? do I have enough if Allah says "time is up, now get back to me?" 

To me, losing Iti (my grandmother) was shocking. I mean, when people know how her condition was before she died, people somehow can "predict". Because she had been sick for over a year, laying on the bed, she could even eat and drink, we have to make something for her and put it on the tube that went through her larynx because she was not able to swallow. She was sick. Doctors said that something happened in her stomach, her gastric, and colons. She could not speak, nor she could recognize my face at that time, as I was home in December 2019 with her, she tried to see me, but she could not speak anything. At that time, she was being hospitalized. I saw my parents' faces, actually, my dad said to me "what if I am there but you could not even make it home?" and Citra, yes the cold-hearted (believe me I was trying hard to hide my emotions) back then just said, "yeah, try to live healthily so you will not suffer any sickness". I was so mean. I know I was not ready to be involved in that kind of conversation.

Okay back again, where were we?

Because her condition was worsened, I was decided to fly back home in September. She was being hospitalized again, no I think after that my parent decided to bring her back home. So the ticket was bought, but at that time, the coronavirus was still spreading so I need to do some paperwork to ensure my ability to fly. I was still working at the architecture firm that morning, but I know I was not concentrated that day because of the news I got last night. And my boss saw it, I said to him that I will go back home in two days, so I will stay at his apartment (owned by him but he did not live there) so I could cut the one-hour or two hours commute to Cologne. He said, "what happened? you looked distracted". I said, "yeah, I heard the news about my grandma". He insisted that I have to change my flight schedule and fly tomorrow so I can spare more time at home. After consulting with my sister, I rescheduled my flight. 

The next thing I know is I was looking for a place to do a PCR Test (back then, it was only possible at the hospital) which was not far from Cologne and the result comes within hours. So I found it in Düsseldorf, near the central station. I was informed that before I flew the next day, the result would already be there.

So I went back to Aachen, my phone was off and I felt so exhausted. I was sleeping in the train, and after one and half hours I was already in Aachen. That time, I think I went straight to my friend's bedroom to print out documents before flying tomorrow. I still heard his voice as he prepared a box for his family in Indo, he already knew that my flight was changed. I charged my phone. It was on and the first massage I saw was "Iti ninggal hun"

Oh, here we go again. This time is not like it was before. I suddenly could not hold my tears. It was just one day, why could I not be there now? Among all five stages of grieves that I know, my first response to Iti's death was anger and regret. I know, Allah has written our Takdir after He gives us ruh while we still in womb, 120 days after the alaq was formed. But my very humanistic response that time was it, I felt bad right now, but it was what I felt.

By the way, my friend was still talking to me, and after noticing that I didn't respond, he turned his face to me and saw me crying. And I think he already knew what happened.

And yeah, I was feeling so sad because I could probably fly earlier than that day, but no regret. Iti is already by Allah's side and I was relieved to remember the time I could spend during her stay at the hospital, the time I spent nursing her, and the most important thing, the time I spent with her during my childhood. 

Iti was the first person I pray shalat maghrib berjamaah with, She taught me duas, she cooked for me, she knew also my love for cooking for the family, because I got that maybe from her. Iti was so beautiful, she also got a very pretty name, Salmah binti Jakfar.

May Allah grant her the best place in Jannah for Iti and Ayik.

May Allah also reunite them again in Jannah, aamiin)

Dresden, 18.01.2022

12:36